Posts Tagged ‘Spiritual Warfare’

Avoiding the Proof – A line in the Sand

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I may as well just admit it. I am avoiding writing or blogging, even though I promised myself I would try a little everyday. I need to lean on God even MORE now…

I have returned to my hobby and crafting room and am working as quickly as I can to get embroidery projects finished and “out of the way.” I’m fit to be tied trying to clean up a disastrous mess. I need to SEE results. I need to take something that APPEARS out of control and bring control to it.

The challenges of life are confusing the heck out of me, I’m searching for some organized “madness.” I am needing to do something where I HAVE to make the decisions but I don’t have to spiritually analyze it to progress. It just gets done.

I am embarrassed to say it but..spiritual growth is hard work, it’s downright exhausting…

After a nearly two year run of searing losses I am plumb tuckered out from grieving. Now, I am watching a situation unfold where someone has/is intentionally rejecting the idea of Jesus. I am certain this person considers the notion of Jesus something out of fairy tales and believes his overflowing grace card is mythical. I can’t change his mind for him. All I can do is live life as God expects – I shouldn’t let it bother me but my soul is heavy. Why?

The eyes are the windows to the soul and I’ve shuddered to see the reflection in those eyes that just won’t let Jesus in.

I AM Frustrated. For the first time ever, I’m beginning to sense what God is feeling when people turn away from him. The consequences may not seem obvious, but with basic knowledge of The Word, such a decision determines a terrible demise. To consciously decide that what we can SEE in the nOw is all there is and anything we can’t see doesn’t exist…is fallacy.

I’ve been so overwhelmed trying to make sense of this the past week… I have tried earnestly to find reason in the logic utilizing “The World” around me:

*I gaze the heavens and look at the clouds. They are “there” visually, but if you were in a plane and flew through them, they literally disappear into nothingness. BUT the clouds are still tHERE….

*The wind blows, and we FEEL it but we can’t see it. It acts as if it were a ghost. Nothingness, but it’s still tHERE.

*My heart beats, I can’t see it. But it’s still tHERE.

*Thunder rolls, it may shake your can hear it, but you can’t see it.. it’s still tHERE.

Frankly, I’m less interested in the evidence about why they happen than I am about the fact that they happen at all.

The doubting Thomases need “proof,” but I would beg to differ that even then (based on the nature of man) that any proof would be a short-lived because for those who lack faith, “proof” is elusive and only leads to needing “more proof.” )And endless cycle that cannot be satiated without God’s mercy)

Avoiding “knowing” God is telling God you don’t need Him, or Heaven…even if you are just procrastinating

Religion is man made – a trap – don’t be fooled and don’t let the enemy confuse you. There is more to this life than what we SEE and religion won’t cut it when eternal assignments are handed out.

Faith IS believing without having seen. Even if you can’t see God, He can SEE YOU

Faith is based on Grace…and Grace is a GIFT. Get over your confusion and doubt – it really is THAT simple.

It doesn’t have to be scary. It just has to be real. Are you ready to get Real with God? Getting Real with Him will be the most important decision YOU ever MAKE.

Jesus is not a myth.. are you really willing to gamble your soul?

Ultimately, by waiting for “proof” you are drawing a line in the sand…

I’m gonna let Ten Avenue North to take it from here:




A New School Year: God College

It’s the eve of another school year. I was ready to “sack out” until I realized, I couldn’t. Now, sleep evades me. I’ve been “haunted” all week by the internet not working while we were on vacation; I didn’t bother to “report” it. I know how to get online and the connection simply wasn’t working. I gave up, because I didn’t want to feel frustrated. I found out on day 4 of 5 that the service had been having problems….which they had finally come by to “fix” 🙂

This Sunday afternoon, I found myself working in my hobby room. I got back to work on my embroidery projects. At some point, those have to get done because I’m growing tired of seeing all the stuff I’ve bought just sit around and not get used. I don’t believe in “waste” – and wasting time is what I appear to be doing…ugh.

I haven’t re-started another 1 year bible plan yet because ThIS time I want to approach it with a calculated effort. I was advised to have pen and paper at the ready to make notes, ask questions and a supply of highlighters handy. When I read it through this time, I am going for depth. The first time I was reading for the “awe” factor and OH MY…there were (what seemed like) hundreds! I don’t understand how I could have waited this long to READ GOD – to KNOW Him. In hindsight, I have missed out these 30-some odd years on His direction, His Guidance…I am now anxious and chomping at the bit to get every morsel of wisdom and clarity that is mine for the taking!

I’ve been suspicious about WHY I am taking such a lofty approach? Why I feel driven to read The Word in such a calculated manner? Because I have been praying that The Lord would bless me with my life-long pursuit of authorship. Because even though I could craft a fictional book (which may or may not be read by the masses) I sense that still small voice calmly telling me my “time has not yet come.” There are some really important messages He wants me to incorporate in this yet-to-be manuscript. Will it ever come to fruition? I have no choice but to believe that it will. Because I think this blog is a stepping stone of sorts. I think He is testing me to see if I have the “chops” to follow His lead and Just DO It. Whether or not that “Book” is in my future only He knows. But I trust Him to know best.

However, I also know that part of my responsibility as is understanding both sides of the equation. While I spent that year reading the bible I had an insatiable appetite to better understand what’s commonly referred to as “Spiritual Warfare.” 2-3 years ago I was completely engulfed in reading the Book of Revelations and I couldn’t get enough of learning about the End Times. Switching gears two years later… biblical priorities have shifted.

This summer alone I’ve read 3 books on spiritual warfare. They were really good. I am fairly certain they will help me to eventually write THE Book I’ve sensed God has laid on my heart to publish. I figure that at some point, God will tell me it’s time and those beautiful words will flow. I will be READY. It is clear to me that I HAD to read about spiritual warfare because we all have to deal with it in one way or another, at some point.

Most of us believe in God, Heaven, the angels, etc. But it becomes much harder to WANT to think about the exact opposite. Our nemesis: our enemy. But the truth is the enemy exists, just as his army of evil co-horts. Consider though that EVERY good book (NO! every GREAT book) has not just a wonderful protagonist…but a super antagonist. You’ve got to create some bad stuff to challenge your protagonist or you DON’T have a story. None of us like to see the protagonist face hardship or serious threat, but would a book keep your attention or your interest if life just “hummed” along? Talk about boring!

You and I are only as effective and efficient as the equipment we “arm” ourselves with. I am most certainly not done with reading scripture. I need to let it take root in my soul so it is a permanent fixture within. Remember I mentioned having read (actually, I dEvOured *pardon the pun*) 3 books this summer? They were Shadow Boxing, The Rules of Engagement and When The Enemy Strikes. All of them were excellent..but my favorites were the first two. And why does that matter?

I can’t easily write FOR God without understanding Him and knowing His heart. I need him to pour out his clarity, his wisdom so I can clearly translate His intent. I need His direction to help me make sense of the good, bad and the ugly. I need to make the reality of God’s love and mercy – real and realistic; FANTASTIC and close at hand. I need to paint a picture and show up Satan for who he is…a fallen angel with no-where to go. I need real characters, with flaws. I need interaction that will make the lost cry out to Jesus and seek “The Way, The Truth, The Light.” But I need prayer…that this will happen according to His Will, according to His plans….

Whether or not the internet is working, whether or not I am able to sit down and write, I will read. I will share what I learn. Whether or not I am blessed by simply writing this blog or someday I have the privilege of writing “The End” I am grateful.

I am in the depths of “God College,” Let the internship begin and the fruit of the spirit bloom!